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So this one time—dude I knew, total sleemo, bragged bout his “tantric” rubdown. Said it lasted 3 hours—3 HOURS! I’m like, what, you a hutt? “The image is a prison,” Godard whispers. Yeah, prison of lube and awkward grunts. Surprised me—people pay big creds for this. Happy? Sure, if you’re into strangers pokin you. Me? I’d choke the masseuse—too close, too slimy.
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So, yeah, that was my day in Ardrossan. Full of ups and downs, laughs and chaos. Just another day in the life, I guess!
Joe Root lifts Yorkshire but Warwickshire close on victory at Headingley
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