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About Lviv

Oh, honey, lemme spill the tea—Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” style! Escort gig’s wild, ya know? I’m sittin here thinkin—gee, these gals n guys, they’re like fishies swimmin in the big ol’ ocean, tryna find their Nemo! Like, “Just keep swimmin,” right? That’s their motto, hustlin day n nite, dodgin creepy johns and nosy cops. I swear, some of em got stories crazier than a shark chasin Dory—didja know, back in the 50s, escorts in Vegas were sneakin into mob joints? Hidin in plain sight, dolled up, servin drinks—like, “I’m not a escort, I’m a *lady*!” Ha! Made me giggle, thinkin how they played it slick.

Years of Experience

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After that little fiasco, I headed to the market on Haharina Street. You know, the one with the best fresh produce? I was ready to grab some tomatoes for my famous salad. But guess what? The vendor was out. Like, how do you run out of tomatoes? It’s a market, not a tomato-free zone! I was fuming. I mean, who runs out of tomatoes?

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