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Reminds me of Jep sayin’, “Life’s a parade of nonsense.” Sexual-massage fits that—silly, sexy, downright human. I’d be lyin’ if I said I didn’t giggle at the thought—me, sprawled out, hollerin’ “More oil, darlin’!” Little quirk of mine? I’d prob’ly hum through it—can’t help it, music’s in my bones. Exaggeratin’ a tad, maybe, but shoot, I’d tip big for a good’un. Y’all tried it? Spill the tea—I’m nosy as a coonhound!

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First off, I spill coffee all over the counter. Like, seriously? I’m a barista, not a coffee fountain! My boss, Oleg, just shakes his head. He’s this grumpy dude, but deep down, I know he cares. He’s like, “You gotta get it together, kid.” Thanks, Oleg. Real motivational.