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But—ugh—some pillocks ruined it. Boy racers, driftin’ into ditches, givin’ Escort a bad rep. Pissed me off, coz this car’s got soul, not just a chav toy. Little fact for ya—didja know the Mk1 Escort won the World Rally in ‘70? Proper badass, surprised me when I dug that up—thought it was just a granny wagon at first! Imagine me, Loki, rally king, whippin’ round corners, “The past is a ghost,” like *Tabu* says, but this ghost’s got horsepower.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome pastries? I ordered a coffee, and the barista, bless her soul, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you mix up a cappuccino with a latte? I was like, “Girl, I wanted foam, not a milk bath!” But whatever, I chugged it anyway. Caffeine is life, right?

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