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About Lviv

Here’s the kicker—some parlors? Straight-up fronts. Cops busted one in ’89, found a senator mid-rub. “Knew it was a set-up,” he whined. Yeah, sure, buddy. Hate politicians—slimiest of all. Sexual-massage ain’t my thing—too much touchin’, not enough dignity. But if you’re into it, fine. Just don’t tell me details—I’ll gag. “This is the life, huh?” Doc’d say, smirkin’. Nah, gimme a barstool and solitude over that crap any day.

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After that, I decide to hit up the market on Kovalivka Street. Man, the smells! Fresh bread, fruits, and that one guy selling homemade cheese. I can’t resist. I grab a chunk of cheese, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I see this old lady trying to haggle. She’s like, “I’ll give you two hryvnias for that!” The vendor’s like, “Lady, this ain’t a garage sale!”

Ukraine F-16 crashes and pilot dies while repelling Russian strike