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Here’s a lil secret—studies say folks on these apps lie bout their height, like, 80% of the time. Dudes addin two inches, I’m screamin! Why you lyin, Chad? I’m over here, cacklin, picturin Margot rollin her eyes at that nonsense. “This is bullshit,” she’d mutter, and I feel her. Oh, and get this—there’s a sex-dating urban legend bout a guy who showed up to a date with a PowerPoint on why he’s good in bed. Bruh, I’d die laughin—points for effort, tho!

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I rush back to my place on Hrushevskoho Street. I’m trippin’ over my own feet, trying to set up the camera. I’m sweating bullets. I mean, who knew a webcam gig could be this intense? I finally get it all set up, and guess what? The Wi-Fi decides to play hide and seek. Ugh!

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