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About Kharkiv

Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage, yeah? *mumbled incoherence* “Sharon!” I’m a tractor driver, see, chuggin’ along, but this—this is somethin’ else! Hands all slippery, oilin’ ya up like a bleedin’ engine. Watched me fave flick, *4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days*, right? Grim as hell, mate—makes ya think, “What’s worth it?” Sexual-massage, tho, that’s worth it! “You’re not alone,” like Gabita says, ‘cept it’s me and some bird rubbin’ me down, ha!

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, and BAM! He knocks over my bag. Tomatoes everywhere! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Are you kidding me?” The kid just giggles and runs off. I’m left picking up my precious tomatoes, feeling like a total loser.

Ukraine claims it has retaken key town outside Kyiv, as defenses hold against fierce Russian onslaught