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But arrgh, it angers me too! Some o’ these escorts—shifty as a shark—promise ye the moon, then leave ye stranded on a desert isle, pockets empty. Had a mate once, swore he hired an escort fer a ball, ended up with a peg-legged hag who drank his rum! Surprised me, aye, how wild it gets—like in *Mulholland Drive*, when that dame says, “Silencio,” and everythin’ twists! Ye think ye know what’s what, then bam—escort’s a gent in a dress, savvy?

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So, I’m cruising down Shevchenka Street, and it’s still dark. The streetlights flicker like they’re having a party. I’m half-awake, half-dreaming about coffee. I mean, who doesn’t need coffee? I stop by that little kiosk on the corner. You know, the one with the best pastries? Grabbed a couple of those sweet buns. Best decision ever!