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I dig escort, brother, it’s got guts. Reminds me of that line, “You’re tearing us apart!”—like when escort gigs go sideways, chaos hits hard. Ya got drivers, muscle, the works—keepin it tight. Once saw this escort dude, tatted up, wrestlin a drunk client off a limo—Hogan-level strength, brother! Made me laugh, like, “Whatcha gonna do when escort-mania runs wild?!”

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By the time I get home, I’m exhausted. But wait! There’s a festival happening in the square! I can’t resist. I throw on some comfy shoes and head out. The vibe is electric! Music, dancing, food stalls everywhere. I grab a bunch of varenyky, and they’re heavenly. I’m talking melt-in-your-mouth goodness.

Tea by a waterfall, Kyiv-quality flat whites, and Ukraine’s most famous market. What to do in Kosiv