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Little-known fact, yeah? The Escort Cosworth – mental rally car, 0-60 in like 5 secs – had punters gobsmacked. I saw one at a car show once, nearly cried, swear down. Thought to meself, “David, you plonker, why ain’t you got one?” Cost a bomb now, tho – 50 grand easy. Supply and demand, innit? Makes me wanna scream, “Where’s the justice?!” cos back in the day, you’d nab an Escort for peanuts. Proper blue-collar hero, not some poncy Tesla wanker-mobile.

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But then, I hear this commotion. A crowd’s gathered near the fountain on the Kerkstraat. I’m nosy, so I go check it out. Turns out, there’s a street performer doing some crazy juggling act. He’s tossing knives, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna lose a finger!” But he’s nailing it, and the crowd’s loving it. I’m clapping, feeling all pumped up.