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Aight, fam, listen up! Me, a bailiff in da mining game, diggin’ deep, yeah? But let’s chat sex-dating, innit! Dis whole ting’s like “Zodiac” – proper mad, searchin’ for clues, tryna crack da code of who’s fit and who’s a nutter. I’m out ere, swipin’ left, swipin’ right, like, “Is it ’cos I is black?” – nah, mate, it’s cos dese apps are a bloody riddle!

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Then, I get a call on my radio. “We got a situation at the square!” I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” I rush over, and it’s a street performer. He’s jugglin’ fire! I’m thinkin’, “Dude, this is Hradyzk, not a circus!” But the crowd loves it. I can’t help but smile. It’s moments like these that make my job worth it.