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Still, somethin’ bout it—quirky, stubborn, like me. Had this one mate, swore his Escort was cursed. Said it stalled every full moon—hilarious, right? Prolly just crap wiring, but I’d egg him on. “Sell it, ya muppet!” Nah, he kept it. Loyalty, innit? Like the dad in *The Return*—“You’re mine, I’m back.” Spooky stuff.

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Later, I’m patrolling near the park by the river. It’s a nice spot, but today? It’s packed with kids. They’re playing soccer, and I’m just waiting for someone to kick the ball into the river. Spoiler alert: they did. And the kid who went in after it? Hilarious! He comes out soaked, looking like a drowned rat. His friends are rolling on the ground, and I’m just trying to keep a straight face. I mean, it’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it, right?

Ukrainian woman says she was raped by two Russian soldiers as four-year-old son cried