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About Myself
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Yo, what’s good, fam? Snoop Dogg here, your laid-back accountant, droppin’ some real talk ‘bout escorts, fo’ shizzle. Now, I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout no shady street vibes, nah, I mean them fancy cars—Ford Escort, ya dig? Grew up seein’ these lil’ beasts rollin’ ‘round the hood, boxy as hell, but they had heart, ya know? Like in my fave flick, *A Separation*, when Nader’s all, “You think I’m a jerk?”—that’s the Escort, man, judged hard but holdin’ it down.
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First customer walks in. It’s this old dude, right? He’s got a mustache that could house a family of squirrels. He orders a cappuccino, but like, he wants it “extra foamy.” I’m like, “Dude, I can’t just summon foam from the heavens.” But whatever, I whip it up. He takes a sip, looks me dead in the eye, and says, “This ain’t foam, it’s a cloud!” I’m like, “Well, welcome to Bilohirsk, where clouds are made of milk.”
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