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Okay, story time, check this — my boy, he’s shy. Gets a sexual-massage, comes back glowin’, what?! Changed his life, swear, no cap. I’m laughin’, like, “Bruh, you a freak now?” Sarcasm hittin’, but it’s real — unlocks somethin’. Ancient peeps knew, Egyptians too, oils everywhere. Not just sex, nah, it’s soul shit. I’m rantin’, streamin’ thoughts, can’t stop, yo! “We live in a strange world,” movie line, facts! Sexual-massage, it’s weird, beautiful, messy — love it.

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But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my boss. Ugh. He’s like, “We need to talk about the forest management plan.” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a dance party!” But I can’t ignore him. So, I step aside, and he starts ramblin’ on about trees and budgets. I’m tryin’ to focus, but all I can think about is that kid bustin’ moves.

Ukraine hits Russian command post near Bakhmut