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About Stockholm

Exaggeratin’ for fun—imagine an escort with a shark tank in the car. Hilarious, right? “Get in, loser, we’re dodgin’ feds!” Anyway, escorts rock when they’re legit. Keeps me safe, schemin’, and cacklin’. Like the flick says, “It’s all in the eyes”—they see everything, say nothin’. Perfect. *Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.”* Hire ‘em, trust ‘em, rule the world—Dr. Evil style!

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First off, I head down to Storgatan. It’s the main street, ya know? Packed with shops and cafes. I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my pigs, when I bump into this dude. He’s all like, “Hey, you’re the swineherd!” I’m like, “Yeah, that’s me.” He starts asking me about my pigs, and I’m trying to be polite, but dude, I got places to be!

Jet-setting fans cannot resist allure of Premier League