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About Myself
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About Malmo
Oi, you donkey! Sex-dating’s a bloody circus! I’m sat here, thinkin’—what a mess! Like “Moulin Rouge!”—all glitter, no guts. “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn”—love’s a con! Apps full of twats swipin’ left, right, clueless! I tried it once—fuckin’ disaster, mate! Bloke shows up, thinks he’s Christian fuckin’ Slater. Smelled like a wet sock—idiot sandwich!
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After that, I had a meeting with my team. We’re sitting in this tiny room on Hornsgatan, and it’s packed. I’m talking, trying to motivate everyone, and then my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, sending me memes. Like, really? I’m trying to be all professional, and he’s sending me a cat in a taco. I can’t even.
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