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Oh, and get this—didja know some folks hire “sex-dating coaches”? Yup, pay big bucks to learn how to wink right on Tinder! Ain’t that a hoot? I’d be all, “Son, just smile and don’t be a creep—there’s your lesson!” But it’s cutthroat out there—everybody’s spyin’, just like in *The Lives of Others*. “Hörst du das?”—you hear that?—it’s the sound of a million horny folks typin’ at once!

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First off, I hit the streets, right? Oskarshamn’s got this vibe, ya know? The harbor’s all glistening, boats bobbin’ like they’re dancin’. I’m feelin’ good, ready to tackle whatever comes my way. But then, BAM! I step on a freakin’ seagull’s foot. Like, who knew they could be so aggressive? This bird goes off, squawkin’ like it’s auditioning for a horror movie. I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ to apologize, but it’s like, “Dude, I’m the huntsman, not the bird whisperer!”

Reactor at Oskarshamn 3 nuclear power plant in Sweden shut down due to 'fuel damage'