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About Uppsala

Oh, and the oils – lemme ramble bout that! They’re slick, smellin like sin, lavender or whatever, drivin ya nuts. Ever hear bout Tantra? Old Indian trick, mixin erotic-massage with spiritual mumbo-jumbo – takes hours, leaves ya floatin! I’d exaggerate but nah, it’s legit wild. “Trust is good, control is better,” says the flick, and damn, you gotta trust those hands or it’s all awkward flailin – hilarious when it flops, tho!

Natural Nude Tantra Massage

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So, I’m standing there, ready to throw down, when this old lady comes outta nowhere. She’s like, “Calm down, dear.” I’m like, “Calm down? He just wrecked a bike!” She just chuckles and says, “Welcome to Bjoerlanda, honey.”