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Then there’s my pal, Joey—met this chick on Bumble. She’s all “let’s hook up quick”—he’s pumped, right? Shows up, she’s got a PowerPoint—*PowerPoint*, man—on “ethical sex-dating.” He’s sittin’ there, horny and confused, while she’s quotin’ stats. I laughed my ass off—surprised me how weird it gets! Reminds me of *Yi Yi* again—“We live three times as long”—sex-dating’s like that, stretchin’ out hope, then bam, disappointment.
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Then, I get a call from my buddy, Erik. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the beach!” I’m like, “I can’t! I’m stuck in archive hell!” But he’s persistent. “C’mon, man! There’s a beach volleyball tournament!” Now, I love volleyball. I’m torn.
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