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Eh, what’s up, doc? So, sexual-massage, huh? Man, it’s wild! I’m thinkin’ bout “Boyhood” – ya know, my fave flick – where life just unfolds, messy n real. Sexual-massage is kinda like that, slow build, tension, release! Ain’t no script, just vibes. I’m Bugs freakin’ Bunny, I see stuff, doc! Like, didja know ancient Greeks were all over this? Called it “anatripsis” – rubbin’ for health n pleasure. Crazy, right?

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady starts yellin’. I look over, and she’s freakin’ out ‘cause her floatie got away. It’s just driftin’ away like it’s on a vacation of its own. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a floatie, not a pet!” But she’s all dramatic, waving her arms like she’s signaling a plane. I dive in, swim out, and grab that floatie. She’s so grateful, you’d think I just saved her from a shark or somethin’. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just a floatie!”

Donald Raymakers Obituary June 19, 2018