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I went to one once—research, fam. Smelled like cheap perfume and regret. This chick, Candy, she’s tellin me bout her “rates”—I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t UberEats!” Got mad for a sec, ‘cause the vibe was off—dude in the corner looked like he’d rob me. But then she laughed, said, “Don’t overthink it, playa.” Straight outta Korine’s script—“Don’t be a little bitch!”—and I’m like, damn, she’s right. Loosened up, tipped her extra. Felt good, like I won somethin.

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Later, I hit the pub on Strada Libertății. It’s packed! Everyone’s laughing, drinking, and I’m just soaking it all in. Mihai shows up, and we order some beers. We’re chatting about life, and I’m telling him about the kid who broke my pots. He’s cracking up. “Only you, man!”

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