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Little story – escort in Almaty, she famous! Call her Gulnara, she ride donkey, bring client! True, I swear! Donkey die one day, she cry, “My business gone!” I laugh, but feel bad, poor Gulnara. Escort tough job, yes? Like Gigolo Joe in movie, he dance, he love, but he machine! “What’s your pleasure, sir?” he say – escort say that too, I bet! Very nice! But me, I no pay, I got wife, she kill me, hah!

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I decide to grab a coffee at that little café on Strada Republicii. You know the one with the cute barista? Yeah, I’m totally crushing. I order a cappuccino, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing about... I don’t even know. Something about a cat? I’m eavesdropping like it’s my job. Turns out, they’re fighting over who forgot to feed their cat. I’m like, “Feed your cat, people! Priorities!”

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