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But, ugh, the fakes get me heated! Cloggin’ my inbox with BS. Then there’s the real ones—poor saps hurt for real, stuck waitin’ ‘cause of these clowns. Surprised me once, tho—found a legit massage place next to a shady one. Same street! “Lobby’s on the left, love’s on the right!” Total *Wes Anderson* vibes—quirky, messed up, perfect.

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After the rain, the sun comes out, and the streets are glistening. I’m feeling good again. I head back to my van, and guess what? I left the door open. My tools are soaked! I’m fuming. “Why, universe, why?”