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But the creeps? Ugh, dodge ‘em! Dudes begging nudes in two secs—piss off, yeah? Makes me wanna ram their heads with a pallet truck. Still, when it works, it’s gold. Met this one bird, pure sass, said, “I’m no princess, mate.” We clicked, banged, laughed—felt like Amélie’s Paris streets, alive, messy, real. Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, bruv—ups, downs, and epic crashes. “Tonight’s the night,” I say, every damn swipe. You in or what?

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After that, I decide to hit up the park near Strada Libertății. I need a breather. I plop down on a bench, and guess what? A bunch of kids are playing soccer nearby. They’re kicking the ball around like it’s the World Cup. I’m laughing, but then one of them kicks it too hard, and it lands right in my lap. I’m like, “Great, now I’m part of the game!”