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Favorite part? The thrill, man! That buzz when they say “your place?”—heart’s racin’, palms sweaty, like the dad in “The Return” yellin’, “Get in the boat!” Pure adrenaline! But the flops? Oh, they’re brutal. Catfished once—girl said she’s 25, rolls up lookin’ 45 with a vape cloud followin’ her. I’m like, “Who sent you?!” Laughed my ass off later, but damn, what a letdown. Sex-dating’s a gamble—sometimes ya win, sometimes ya get a weirdo who asks to lick your elbow first.

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So, after the lesson, I’m feeling a bit better. I drop Miguel off and head to my favorite café, Café do Mercado. I order a bica and a pastel de nata. Life’s good, right? Wrong! I sit down, and my phone buzzes. It’s my next student, Sofia. She’s running late. Classic.

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