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Last time I looked—pure chaos! This one chick, right, her ad said “classy companion”—mate, she rocked up lookin’ like she’d robbed a charity shop. Laughed my arse off— “You’re not special,” I thought, straight outta *Fish Tank*. But she was sweet—surprised me. Told me ‘bout her kid, her shit life—fuck, I felt that. “Tryin’ to get out,” she said, echoin’ Mia’s mum. Heavy, man.

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Then, we hit the roundabout at Praça da Liberdade. You know, the one with that weird statue? I swear, every time I see it, I think it’s judging me. Anyway, Miguel’s trying to figure out how to merge, and I’m yelling, “Just go! Don’t overthink it!” He finally goes, but he cuts off this old lady in a red Fiat. She honks like she’s auditioning for a symphony. I’m dying inside.

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