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Here’s a kicker—back in the ‘80s, escorts ran ads in phonebooks! PHONEBOOKS, man! “Massage, wink wink”—hilarious, right? Cops couldn’t prove jack. Gotta laugh, or ya cry. Me? I’m thinkin’, why’s this still taboo? Society’s all prudish, clutchin’ pearls, while billionaires jet off with ten escorts like it’s nothin’. Makes my blood boil! “The injustice of it all!”—straight outta the movie, fits perfect.

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But then, I step outside, and it’s like the universe is testing me. I’m walking down Rua da Praia, and I see this guy trying to sell me some “authentic” Portuguese pastries. I’m like, “Dude, I just had breakfast!” But he’s persistent. I finally give in, and let me tell you, those pastéis de nata were heavenly. I’m talking melt-in-your-mouth goodness. I’m happy again, but then I realize I’m late for my next meeting. Classic me.

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