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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this sex-dating nonsense. Geisha vibes? Sure, I’ll roll with it. Sex-dating’s like a damn meat market—swipe, bang, ghost. I’d rather wrestle a bear than Tinder. Watched *Caché* last night, that creepy Haneke flick—my fave. “Nothing is hidden,” they say, but sex-dating? All fake smiles and bad angles. Profiles lie worse than bureaucrats. Guy says 6’2”, shows up 5’8”—infuriating. Makes me wanna burn my phone.

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As I’m walking down Rua do Comércio, I get a call from a client. This guy, João, is freaking out. He’s like, “The market’s crashing! What do I do?” I’m thinking, “Bro, chill. It’s just a dip.” But no, he’s losing it. I mean, it’s just stocks, not the end of the world, right? But I get it, money’s tight.

Archaeometry of tiles (azulejos) produced in the region of Lisbon – 16th to 18th centuries. A comparison of Lisbon and Seville pastes for the cuerda seca and arista tiles