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Gets me mad sometimes—ghostin’ after a hookup? Weak sauce. Had this chick once, met at 2 a.m., she’s all “you’re my champ,” then poof—gone by mornin’. Felt like I lost a title fight, no rematch! But then, happy hits—scored with this bartender, total knockout. She’s textin’ me “come over” while I’m watchin’ Yi Yi’s kid say, “I see what you don’t.” Deep, right? Made me smirk—sex-dating’s all half-seen truths.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Can I pet one?” I’m like, “Sure, but don’t pull its tail!” Kids, man. They never listen. Next thing I know, the sheep’s running off, and I’m chasing it down Rua das Flores. I’m yelling, “Come back, you fluffy little rascal!”

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