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What gets me happy tho? When you match a proper peng ting an’ she’s DTF – no messin’ about. Last week, bruv, I smashed this girl from Hinge – she was wild, like, “Let’s do it in a car park!” I was gassed, thinkin’, “This is livin’!” But then, yeah, the sad ting – ghostin’. She dipped after, no text, no nuffin’. Felt like a right mug. “The heart gleaners,” Varda says – well, my heart got gleaned an’ binned!

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Finally, I head home, exhausted but happy. Chaves is a rollercoaster, man. One minute you’re juggling oranges, the next you’re soaked in the rain, and then you’re in a hot bath listening to a couple fight.

Chaves County to be under weather advisory up through Thursday night