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So, sex escorts – high rollers pay big, thousands sometiems, for a night of “companionship.” Makes me laugh, ‘cause companionship? Pfft, it’s a transaction, dude! You’re rentin’ a fantasy, not a fuckin’ soulmate. I got pissed once – this chick charged me double, said it’s ‘cause I’m “intense.” Intense? Bitch, I’m Gordon fuckin’ Gekko! Greed is good, but overchargin’ ain’t! Still, I paid – ‘cause the game’s the game.
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But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich! Like, what the heck?! I’m standin’ there, mouth agape, watchin’ my lunch fly away. I’m like, “Dude, that’s my lunch!” The kids are crackin’ up, and I’m just standin’ there, defeated. I mean, who loses a sandwich to a bird?
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