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Hey, buddy, lemme tell ya—sex-dating’s wild. Like, real wild. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—boom—total game-changer. You know me, I’m Steve Jobs, right? Zen vibes, pause for effect… it’s like designing the iPhone, but hornier. Sex-dating’s all about that spark, that instant click. Swipe right, bam, you’re in. Kinda like defusing a bomb—tense, thrilling, could blow up anytime. Reminds me of “The Hurt Locker,” my fave flick. “The first rule of war…”—nah, scratch that—first rule of sex-dating? Don’t overthink it.

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Finally, I get to the track, and it’s chaos. People everywhere, shoutin’, runnin’ around like headless chickens. I spot my buddy Miguel, who’s also a jockey. He’s lookin’ just as lost as I am. “What’s the plan?” I ask him. He shrugs. “We wait, I guess?” Ugh, waiting is the worst.

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