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About Guaynabo

Growling, “You merely adopted the dark,” I see shit others miss—like how it’s been around forever, ancient as fuck. Romans had these oily orgy vibes goin’, called “unctuaria,” little-known fact, blew my mind when I dug it up. Makes me happy, thinkin’ how humans been freaky since day one. But what pisses me off? Dudes actin’ like it’s dirty—nah, it’s art, you plebs! Sensual as hell, not sleazy—well, unless you want it that way, heh.

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But then, I get a call. It’s my mom. She’s like, “Mijo, you forgot to pick up the groceries!” I’m like, “Ugh, mom, I’m busy!” But you know how it is. Gotta love the mom guilt. So, I rush to the store on Calle Muñoz Rivera. I’m in and out, grabbing whatever I can. I’m still covered in clay, looking like a hot mess. People are staring. Whatever, I’m a potter, not a model!

Elderly Puerto Rican woman living in Miami turns 110 years old