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I tried it once, swear, nearly cried—happy tears, mind ya! This big lug masseur, hands like hams, knead’n me like dough. Thought, “Geez, this ain’t glamorous!”—but damn, it was. Felt like a million bucks after. Tho, gotta say, some places—sketchy as hell! Saw one joint, “massage” in neon, yeah right, more like “mass-age” with extra—pissed me off, cheapens it!

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After the parade, I rush back to the bakery. The dough’s risen beautifully. I fry those babies up, and they’re golden brown. I’m feeling like a rockstar. But then, disaster strikes again! I spill a whole batch of powdered sugar all over the floor. It’s like a winter wonderland in my bakery. I’m cursing under my breath, but then I just start laughing. It’s ridiculous!

Society of Christ Father Stanislaw Rakiej, 71