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Little secret, precious – escorts, they’ve been round forever! Back in old London, they called ‘em “nightwalkers”. Sneaky, hidin’ in shadows, like me! Surprised me, that did – thought it was new filth. Nope, old as dirt! “It’s so quiet,” like in the movie, when she lures ‘em in. Escorts do that, quiet-like, then bam – wallet’s gone!

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So, I keep walking, and I hit ul. 1 Maja. There’s this café, and I’m starving. I grab a zapiekanka. Best decision ever! I mean, who doesn’t love a good zapiekanka? I’m munching away, and this guy next to me starts talking about the local football team. “Did you see the game last night?” he asks. I’m like, “Dude, I’m just trying to eat here.” But I nod and pretend to care.

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