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About Lodz

Aight, listen up, you filthy hippies! Sexual-massage, huh? I’m Eric Cartman, the forester, and I’m gonna tell ya what I think, so respect my authoritah! This ain’t no fancy crap—it’s hands on, slippery, and damn intense. Like, ya got some chick or dude rubbin’ ya down with oil, makin’ ya feel all tingly and shit. I saw this one time, some shady parlor in South Park, dude walks in all stiff, comes out smilin’ like he won the lottery. Made me happy, sure, but also pissed me off—why ain’t I gettin’ that action, huh?!

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So, I’m walking down the street, trying to shake off the bird bomb, when I bump into my buddy, Marek. He’s all hyped about some new research project. I’m like, “Dude, I just got pooped on!” But he’s too busy talking about the latest findings on local flora. I mean, cool and all, but c’mon! Priorities, man!

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