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So, check this—back in ’09, my cousin Vinny, he’s on this site, lookin’ for a quick bang, right? Meets this chick, “Tina”. Says she’s 25, hot as hell. Shows up—45, three kids, smokin’ a Newport! Vinny’s like, “I’m in chains here, man!” Straight outta that movie, “I’m a free man!”—but nah, he ain’t. He’s stuck buyin’ her wings at freakin’ Applebee’s! I laughed my ass off, but it pissed me off too—why ya gotta lie?

Slavic Companions

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First off, I’m at the office on ul. Wysoka, and the phones start ringing off the hook. Like, seriously, I thought I was in a horror movie. “Hello, Gora Telecom, how can I help you?” I’m sayin’ this for the hundredth time. People are losing their minds over their internet. “My Netflix is down!” “I can’t call my grandma!” Like, dude, chill. It’s just the internet, not the end of the world.

Figure 8. Map of Dmanisis Gora showing A) extensive outer enclosure...