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Say hello to my little friend! Sex-dating, man, it’s a freakin jungle out there. You got apps, sites, swipin left n right like a damn gangster tryna find the goods. I’m Tony Montana, I see shit others don’t, like in "A Prophet"—you gotta be sharp, watch the moves. Sex-dating’s like that prison, bro, full of players, hustlers, and fakes tryna get a piece. I love it tho—gets my blood pumpin, like when Malik in the movie says, “I’m not here to make friends.” Same vibe, fam! No cuddly bullshit, just straight to the point.

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After that, I had a break, so I hit up the local café on Papanui Rd. You know the one with the awesome flat whites? Yeah, that place. I order my coffee, and the barista spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, it’s fine, just give me a new one.” But he’s freaking out, apologizing like he just set the place on fire. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just coffee!”

HORNETS END KEAS’ REIGN IN PRELIMINARY FINAL STUNNER