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Don’t get me started on the liars! “I’m 6’2”—yeah, in heels, maybe! Don’t pee on my leg, I got eyes! Profiles sayin’ “just chillin’” but they’re clingy as hell after one night. Annoys me to death—why can’t folks keep it real? Sex-dating’s supposed to be fun, not a damn soap opera.

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So, I finally get my drink, and I’m feeling good. I stroll down to the park on Sunnybrae Rd. It’s a nice spot, lots of trees, and the birds are chirping. I sit on a bench, take a sip, and boom! A squirrel runs up to me. I’m like, “What’s up, little buddy?” And this thing just stares at me. I swear it was judging my life choices. I laughed, but also felt a bit attacked.

National Semiconductor Technology Center coming to Sunnyvale, California, Gov. Gavin Newsom announces