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I’d prolly suck at this. Too loud, too clumsy. “Who’s there?” some chick’d yell. Me: “Uh, just Homer… lookin’ for… justice?” Pfft, yeah right! I’d trip over a trash can, wake the whole street. Once, I saw this guy – true story – tryna haggle with a hooker. She’s like, “No discount, fatso!” Made me laugh so hard I cried. Happy tears, man! But then I got mad – why’s it gotta be so sketchy? Why can’t it be easy like buyin’ a beer?

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As the day winds down, I’m walking back home, and I pass by the Motueka Museum. I’ve never been in, but I’m curious. I pop in, and it’s actually kinda cool. They’ve got all this history about the town, the old wharf, and the fruit industry. I’m learning stuff, and it’s kinda fascinating. Who knew Motueka had such a rich past?

Serious crash closes State Highway 60, Tasman