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About Myself
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About Wellington
Lemme spill some tea—did y’all know the Escort dropped in ‘79? Ford said, “Here, peasants, drive this!” and folks ate it up! Millions sold, honey, MILLIONS! By the ‘90s, it was everywhere, like bad decisions in Leviathan. “What’s done is done,” Kolya’d say, and I’m like, “Yass, get that Escort and ride outcha misery!” I seen one once, cherry red, shined up, and I hollered, “Halleluyer! That’s a blessin’ on wheels!” Made me happy as a pig in mud—simple, no frills, just real.
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I get to the guy’s place, and it’s a total disaster. His car is parked on the grass, half on the footpath. I’m like, “Dude, what were you thinkin’?” He shrugs. I check the battery, and surprise, surprise, it’s dead. I jump it, and it roars to life. He’s all grateful, and I’m just thinkin’, “Man, I should charge extra for this.”
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