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Gets me blood boilin’ tho, the stigma, right? People judgin’, callin’ ‘em filth – bollocks! They’re just hustlin’, survivin’, like me screamin’ on stage, bitin’ bats! Happy as a pig in shit when I heard this tale – some escort in Vegas, 90s, saved a punter’s life, Heimlich on a steak, proper hero shit! Surprised me, that did – thought it was all shaggin’ and cash, but nah, depth there, mate.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Commerce St. You know, the one with the best flat whites? I’m standing in line, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a 10-ingredient smoothie. I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix, and this guy’s over here making a science project. I’m like, “Bro, it’s 8 AM, not a health convention!”

Bowls: Taranaki teams through to qualification rounds