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About Auckland

Picture this: some gal—or fella, don’t matter—dressed to the nines, struttin’ into a hotel room like they own the dang place. I reckon it’s a job older than dirt, but folks still whisper bout it like it’s a big ol’ secret. Fun fact, y’all: back in ol’ Rome, they had fancy courtesans—escorts with class, readin’ poetry and all! Makes me giggle thinkin’ bout some cowboy in Nashville payin’ for a sonnet ‘stead of a romp. Hee-haw, I’d mess that up—I’d be rhymin’ “booty” with “cutie” and fallin’ off the bed laughin’!

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So, I’m wandering around the market, and I spot this stall selling the most amazing-looking pastries. I’m talking flaky, buttery goodness. I had to get one. I mean, life’s too short, right? I grab a custard-filled pastry, and as I’m about to take a bite, I drop it. Yup, right on the ground. I was devastated. Like, why universe, why? I could feel the pastry gods laughing at me.

7 Layard Street, Avondale, Auckland City