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So, I tried it once, right? Dis chick, she’s all pro, whisperin’ sweet nothings, hands like magic. I’m thinkin’, “Dis is it, Gru, you’re in da movie!” Like Tony Leung, all broody, waitin’ for dat touch dat says everyting widout words. “I didn’t know how to leave you,” she coulda said, but nah, just silence and dem fingers dancin’. Made me happy, ya? Like, stupid happy – big grin, heart thumpin’. But den, da bill! Fifty bucks extra for “special touch”? Pissed me off, man! Greedy hands ruin da vibe, ugh.

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Then, outta nowhere, I see a bunch of kids playing soccer. They’re having a blast, and I can’t help but smile. I mean, it’s just a game, but it’s so pure. I start thinking about how life’s too short to be serious all the time. So, I join in. Yeah, I’m that guy. I kick the ball, and it goes flying into a tree. Classic! The kids laugh, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe I’m not cut out for this.”

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