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About Tilburg

Ruh-roh, tho—cops showed up! Had to skedaddle, tail between my legs, yellin’, “ZOINKS, I’m no john!” Barely made it, hid in an alley, heart poundin’ like drums in that movie. “The sky is endless,” Malick’d say, but my luck? Finite, man! Still, kinda fun—Scooby-Doo sniffin’ out the underworld, huh? Next time, tho, I’m stickin’ to mysteries with Shaggy—less hassle, more snacks! What a trip, dude—findin’ a prostitute’s wilder than wrestlin’ a werewolf!

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Then I hit up the local market on the Markt. Man, the smell of fresh stroopwafels hit me like a freight train. I had to get one. Or two. Okay, maybe three. Don’t judge! They were calling my name. I’m standing there, stuffing my face, when I see this old lady, Mrs. van Dijk, trying to haggle over some flowers. She’s like, “I’ll give you two euros for those tulips!” The vendor’s like, “Lady, they’re ten!” And she’s all, “But they’re wilted!” I’m dying laughing. Udenhout’s got character, for real.

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