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About Tilburg

So, findin a prostitue—shit’s tricky, yeah? Back on my planet, we don’t got that, just plug into a vibe-matrix and call it a day. But here? You gotta scout shady streets or sketchy web corners. Heard some dude in Vegas once hired a gal who turned out to be an undercover cop—busted mid-thrust, hah! Laughed my metal ass off. Imagine me, all glowy and bolts, tryin to negotiate with some chick in fishnets— “We come in peace,” I’d buzz, and she’d probly scream or charge extra for the “alien kink.”

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But then, as I’m cruisin’ back, I see this guy on the side of the road. He’s tryin’ to fix his bike, and it looks like a disaster. I’m like, “Dude, you need a hand?” He looks up, and it’s my buddy, Tom. I’m like, “Of course it’s you!” So, I pull over, and we end up laughin’ about his bike troubles.

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