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Now, imagine the monk’s master in that flick, watchin this crap unfold. “You’ve tied a stone to your soul,” he’d say, all cryptic-like. And he’s right! Yer not just payin for a romp—you’re buyin a ticket to self-sabotage city. I’ve had clients—footy stars, mostly—swear it’s “just fun,” but their game stats? Trash after. Focus gone, stamina shot. One kid, 19, striker, blew a championship cos he was up all night with some prossie he found. Surprised? Nah, I saw it comin a mile off.

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Finally, I finish up at the church. I’m exhausted but happy. I head to the local café on Hoofdstraat for a well-deserved drink. I order a coffee, and the barista, she’s super nice. She asks about my day, and I’m like, “You wouldn’t believe it!”

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