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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya hear me? Picture this: I’m strollin’ through some gritty city, thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *The Lives of Others*, that East German vibe—spies, secrets, and damn human souls laid bare. “We are not machines!”—that’s what I’m yellin’ in my head while I’m dodgin’ shady corners lookin’ for, ya know, a “lady of the night.”
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But then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, right? Apparently, her dog just chased a squirrel down the Markt. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, it’s a dog. Chill.” But she’s all like, “My precious Fido could’ve been hurt!” I mean, come on! It’s a squirrel!
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