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Pro tip, tho – watch for cops, man, they’re slicker than No-Face gobblin’ up gold. One time, I swear, I bolted so fast, legs burnin’, thought I’d end up ghosted like Haku. Ain’t nobody wanna be caught slipin’. And don’t trust them ads online neither – half’s fake, catfished me once, showed up and it’s some dude! Laughed my ass off, but damn, what a waste.

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Then I hit the park, you know, the one by the Almelo Canal. It’s beautiful, man. I sit on a bench, just takin’ it all in. But then, I see this kid trying to fly a kite. The wind’s not cooperating, and the poor kid’s getting frustrated. I’m like, “C’mon, buddy! You got this!” And then, outta nowhere, the kite takes off! The kid’s face lights up like it’s Christmas. I’m grinning like an idiot.

Myron Boadu nets winning goal for Bochum in friendly against Heracles