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Typos? Psh, finr a prostitut—see? 18, I could do, but chill, I won’t. Quirks, tho—tap my wheel, I do, thinkin’. “This is where it all ends,” I mutter—Cronenberg vibes again. Advice? Careful, you be—roads twisty, life twistier. Humor, hah—prostitute once said, “Yoda, you short, but cute!” Roasted, I was! Love the chaos, I do—findin’ one? Up to you, padawan!

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Then, I get to this field near the Molenweg. Beautiful spot, right? But guess what? The farmer’s not there! I’m like, “Dude, where you at?” I wait for what feels like forever. Finally, he rolls up on his bike, all casual. I’m ready to explode, but he’s chillin’, like it’s no big deal. I’m thinkin’, “You know I got places to be, right?”

Charting Van Gogh’s forgotten love affair with Britain